A photo published by The Onion is captioned: "Hercules, son of Zeus, outlines his plan for funding the new pedestrian overpass on Maple Street." (theonion.com / June 2, 2009)
An article published Monday on the Web site for the satirical newspaper The Onion claims mythic hero Hercules is running for the Greensboro City Council District 2 seat currently occupied by Goldie Wells. The task, set forth by Mycenaean king Eursytheus, is the lesser-known 13th in a series of labors that Hercules must complete as penance for the murder of his wife and children, as declared by the Oracle at Delphi.
From the article:
To complete his new task, Hercules first had to wait several millennia for the New World to be discovered and colonized, for democratic ideals to flourish during the Age of Enlightenment, and for the United States be founded and win its independence.
He then had to move to North Carolina, become a naturalized citizen, and wait until the town of Greensboro was incorporated in 1829. When this was done, he established residency in the fledgling town and waited an additional 100 years for the second district to take form, at which point he began his numerous campaigns.
According to The Onion, the specifications of the labor require Hercules to run every part of the campaign himself: "Consequently, he mans the phone banks and stuffs envelopes all day, breaking only for public appearances at supermarket grand openings and fun runs."
There has been no comment from fellow District 2 candidate -- and real person -- Ryan Shell.
Read full article at theonion.com
From the article:
To complete his new task, Hercules first had to wait several millennia for the New World to be discovered and colonized, for democratic ideals to flourish during the Age of Enlightenment, and for the United States be founded and win its independence.
He then had to move to North Carolina, become a naturalized citizen, and wait until the town of Greensboro was incorporated in 1829. When this was done, he established residency in the fledgling town and waited an additional 100 years for the second district to take form, at which point he began his numerous campaigns.
According to The Onion, the specifications of the labor require Hercules to run every part of the campaign himself: "Consequently, he mans the phone banks and stuffs envelopes all day, breaking only for public appearances at supermarket grand openings and fun runs."
There has been no comment from fellow District 2 candidate -- and real person -- Ryan Shell.
Read full article at theonion.com
